


Sunshine

by neverknew



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon, Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Drama & Romance, F/F, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-09
Updated: 2020-06-09
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:40:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,320
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24629437
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neverknew/pseuds/neverknew
Summary: A/U. HotAmi.  Oneshot. (adult Hotaru)The girls have grown and are living out their separate lives. Relationships wane and push like a tide, but the inners are inseparable - that is, until Hotaru pulls away. Ami appears unexpectedly to check on her, but isn't prepared for the battered soldier that Hotaru has become in her absence.
Relationships: Mizuno Ami & Tomoe Hotaru, Tomoe Hotaru/Mizuno Ami
Kudos: 8





	Sunshine

**Author's Note:**

> This work was originally posted on ff.net under the title "The Price of Power" (still my own work). There was a lot of interest for more, so I've doubled the size of it - lots of growth and relationship development. With all the new content, the old title didn't really fit so I hope this one does.
> 
> This is a such a rare coupling but they have SO MUCH POTENTIAL if done right. Hopefully I can convince some readers to join the dark side with me and start shipping them. 
> 
> Sorry about any mistakes or weird wordings; I didn't give my beta a chance to look it over cuz I just really felt like getting something up today. 
> 
> That's it. Enjoy!~

Their laughter rang loud and true across the apartment.

It was rare that they all got together like this nowadays. But here they all were -- all six senshi, crammed into her tiny apartment, the laughter flowing through the room like the sound of a waterfall cascading, the wine passing between them freely atop a table of full food. She had never had so many people at her place at once. She entered her dark apartment to find it filled to the brim, dishes of delicacies spread across her kitchen counters and the wine already freely flowing, surrounded by her fastest friends, glee on their features as a uniform yell sounded through the full room at her entrance. Ami blanked, then finally found her words. "Ahh.. uh. Hi."

The food was already being plated, and to her embarrassment, there wasn't enough room for everyone to sit. Rei and Mina stood in the kitchen, eating in mock obscurity as the others straggled into the living room. They plopped at odd ends at the coffee table or into the sparse plush seating, their plates nestled firmly in their laps as they ate away. Still too stunned to speak herself, Hotaru pushed a plate into Ami's hands with a knowing wink before nudging her away to the party. She settled down next to her shortly after, and Ami couldn't help shooting her a mischievous smile before diving into the masterpiece that was Mako's dinner. 

* * *

  
"...For the new doctor." A refilled wine glass landed on the table with a light clink, a twin glass landing next to it.   
  
Ami let out a light chuckle, pulling a sip as she watched Hotaru over rim of glass, settling back onto the carpet beside her. "Thanks."   
  
"Hmmm. 'Twas my pleasure," the lanky raven took a sip from her own glass, leaning back against the couch at their backs. Their visits usually ended up like this -- the couches forgotten as nothing more than a pricy backrest, drinks upon the coffee table, the TV casting shadows against them as they talked into the night.   
  
The blunette slid her glass back into place carefully as a knowing hum thrummed from her throat; she had long lost track of how many glasses she'd had, and the room was pleasantly warm around her. "I meant for..." her finger swung around the room, encompassing the leftovers of their party; the unwrapped gifts and wrapping littering the floor, the crumbled streamers lifelessly dangling off her furniture, the mostly-empty platters of finger-food that sat before them. "...Everything." The rest of the senshi had eventually staggered out, after many cheery glasses and congratulations, and now it was just the two of them.   
  
Hotaru hummed happily into her own glass, pulled a leg up and slackly wrapped an arm around it. She pulled her glass away with a satisfied smack before placing it down; slender fingers giving it a casual push to make sure it was safely away from the edge of the table.   
  
"That..." The glass slid fluidly along table, the liquid lapping at the sides pleasurably. "...was also my pleasure." She settled the genius with a smile.   
  
Ami laughed, outright.   
"You really got me, you know."   
  
The senshi chuckled at her darkly. "I know. That was the point."   
  
A languid sip.   
"Besides. You really thought we were going to let you go on, unperturbed with your new life? You're a doctor now, Ames. That's a reason for celebration."   
  
Ami hmmed into her glass. "I figured Mina was already planning something. Considered scheduling something myself, but thought better of it - Mina would just outdo me anyway. So, I thought, might as well let her do all the planning if it's going to happen anyway." The last syllables bubbled out of her as more of a song, a melody, than actual spoken words.   
  
She eyed the woman mysteriously as she took another sip.   
"Wasn't expecting you to help with it, though."   
  
The senshi laughed, refilling a glass as she did so.   
"She came to me, actually. Positively begged. Was completely against it at first but then she asked --- who else would be able to make it a surprise?"   
  
Ami tipped her glass in silent cheers.   
  
"Then I realized, what better place than your own house? I already have a key, and there's certainly nothing out of the ordinary about me bringing over a late dinner when you get home... Then it was just a matter of conceding to the uncontained enthusiasm as the others jumped on board..."  
  
Ami laughed. Hotaru's eyes had a way of lighting up when she talked about the other senshi. As much as she acted like she only tolerated their presence, she had a severe soft spot for the whole of them that she would never admit to. Ami found it her profound duty to never call her on it -- to just lead and nudge the conversation in their direction; and Hotaru always followed her lead, her eyes misting as she spoke of their fellow warriors.   
  
They'd become fast friends -- almost inseparable. Hotaru had her own form of genius, but she got all of Ami's jokes nonetheless. The first time she had rambled off about the recent medical journal she had been reading, her cheeks had blushed, afraid she would receive the airy look of someone who had just heard a foreign language. But Hotaru had settled solid eyes upon her, her eyes dark but clear as she worked out the words just spoken. And then, she had asked a single question."But... why would they claim the results 'unreputable' when they highlighted unprecedented outcomes because of false controls?"

  
Hotaru's silky smooth voice pulled her out of her thoughts, and she blinked to see Hotaru laughing avidly as she spoke. "Besides, there was going to be a party anyways. At least this way, we get to pick the cutoff time. Fun part about having it at your own place --- you get to kick your guests out when they've had enough."   
  
Ami laughed, raising her glass once more and Hotaru met it with a light clink.   
  


* * *

  
The sun was shining brightly, and Ami smiled, spotting her target lounging lazily at the sun-bleached table. She looked so at home, a Mimosa in hand, a long, shapely leg crossed over the other, suitably clad in a short-cut miniskirt, a black, simple blouse topped with a wide sunhat. Ami smiled. It always amazed her how quickly the woman had transitioned from girl to woman, and how elegant she always managed to look without even trying; a trait she always assumed she had learned from her mom. Then again, - she thought, as she skipped the front entrance and let herself in through the gate, sliding into the seat across from her, - she could make a paper bag look amazing.   
  
The woman only arched an eyebrow in acknowledgment, unperturbed over dark glasses.   
"Always the punctual one."   
  
Ami nodded.   
"Thanks for the invite. Haven't done anything but work and sleep, and not much of the latter."   
  
Another patient eyebrow arch, and Ami watched as teeth played politely with straw before taking another sip, the glass landing on table with a light tap.   
"I was almost afraid you were avoiding me."   
  
She chuckled.   
"No. A couple of our new residents quit. We've all been scrambling until we get more coverage. I wasn't trying to avo--"   
  
The waiter suddenly appeared, dropping a drink onto table before shuffling away. Ami only blinked at her favorite drink landing beside her, and the raven didn't try to hide the amusement on her features, waving away the current conversation. "'Tis fine."   
  
The doctor couldn't help but chuckle back, sipping at the mojito gratefully as the raven watched on.   
  
"Hope you don't mind, I ordered for you. Didn't know if you'd only have a short lunch before you had to get back to it."   
  
This only made Ami smile around her drink. "It's perfect, Hotaru." She couldn't help the way the silly grin bloomed even brighter upon her face. "Thanks for this. I really needed it."   
  
The smile that was returned to her was genuine, and Hotaru tipped sunglasses down nose, eyes twinkling at her above rims.   
"'Twas my pleasure. If you keep up these shifts, we'll do it again."   
  
The doctor laughed.   
"I like that plan."

* * *

  
"I'm telling you Sunshine, we should get a place."   
  
Ami smiled at her around a mouthful of warm Chinese, covering her mouth with a happy hmm around her words.  
"You think."   
  
Hotaru nodded back, graceful fingers raising full chopsticks to her own lips. "Mmm. I do. Why else would you come home if it wasn't for me bringing over takeout at odd hours of the night?"   
  
Ami nodded, chewing her food before swallowing it down. "Yeah, I probably would have spent the night there. I have another double in the morning. I keep saying there's no reason for you to show up so late..."  
  
Hotaru pulled a long sip of wine before smiling at her. They paired it with everything. Hotaru had developed a strong liking for it when she came of age, and it had turned consistently into her guilty pleasure. "Hmm. Well like I said, night shift now. Besides, your dinner would be a half a bagel otherwise. And then a double shift, minus breakfast in the morning."   
  
Ami only nodded at her tiredly through another bite. Now she was warm and comfortable, the aches pulling at her muscles as they lounged comfortably on Hotaru's bed, the pull-out couch. She'd made sure to find a comfortable one for the sake of Hotaru, but more often than not she never made it to her own bed, lulling into a restful slumber by full stomach, the welcome companionship of Hotaru's late night-channel surfing beside her.   
  
"Besides." Hotaru ticked her head in the direction of the TV. She was pretty sure the raven used it more than she ever did. "You have the good cable."   
  
Ami giggled tiredly. The food and wine was working its magic, her eyes getting heavy. She had recently began wondering if Hotaru's new hobby of a wine connoisseur had anything to do with her own very late shifts and her inability to get enough sleep, ever. Admittedly, she always did sleep better when Hotaru was already here, usually with takeout in hand...   
  


* * *

  
"Your sound system is amazing." Ami smiled, her eyes closed as the lilting sounds of Michiru's violin floated around her.   
  
"Mmmm. The most expensive thing in this apartment. I asked Mich-mama to get me a nice one; of course she didn't disappoint."   
  
Ami smiled, lounging back on her seat in the couch. "You can definitely tell. It's like I'm at one of her concerts..." But a look distaste crossed her features as she settled against the cushions. "Hotaru.... We have got to upgrade your furniture. This couch is a rock."   
  
The woman laughed as she slid in beside her.   
"I never notice. I only use it when you're here."   
  
The blunette squinted through tired eyes, taking in the rest of her apartment.   
"We need to upgrade your whole apartment."   
  
The raven hmmmed around a sip of wine.   
"I like it. It's homely. And all mine."   
  
The blunette turned to regard her, her tone softening.   
"I could get you in, if you'd like. At the hospital. I'm sure Sets could doctor you some papers..."   
  
Hotaru shrugged.   
"I like my job, my place. I know that... that you're amazing. That you'll do amazing things. You'll change the world. But I just.. I just want to live in it."   
  
The words seemed to echo, vibrate within her, and she sat up, curbing the wine at the coffee table so she could think better. Suddenly it was a puzzle, and the answer was staring her in the face. It was in the hard cushions beneath her, the stained carpet beneath her feet, the way the fridge dripped and wasn't cold enough, the temperamental shower and the dents upon the furniture, even when they were new arrivals. "That's just it, isn't it, Taru? Normal? You never.. you never got that, did you?"   
  
The raven began to open her mouth, but the concentration was clear on Ami's features, the wheels still ticking, and the raven only stilled, dropping her glass on the table waiting for her to arrive on an answer.   
  
"You were the only one that never had a taste. You don't remember what it's like to not be a senshi."   
  
The smile that graced the raven's lips was both warm and sad at the same time.   
"I wouldn't trade it for anything."   
  
"But it's quiet now. It has been. And that's when you grew."   
  
Hotaru didn't answer, instead her eyes fell to the glass before her, picking it up with long elegant fingers, swilling the dark liquid.   
  
"...Do you miss them?"   
The question fell cautiously, whispered from the blunette's lips.   
  
The psychic shrugged. Ami was rarely blunt -- but when she was, it was vital. So she closed her eyes, mulling over the question for a moment before settling on the right words, and the woman sat silently waiting beside her. "Of course I miss them. Every day."   
  
"I miss Papa's dogged sarcasm. The quick wit that Mama swears she gave me. I miss the cool of Mama's voice, like a breeze in the room. I miss the full house, the four of us together every night at the dinner table. Mama, teaching me to swim; the smell of the chlorine heavy in her hair and the grease on my knuckles as Papa showed me how to change the carburetor."   
  
She sighed wistfully, the image of the smiling pair before her.   
"I miss Papa, her arms strong around me as she swung me through the air. That teasing smile she always had as she messed up my hair, the way she never talked down to me -- always kneeling down to look me in the eye. The taste of chocolate on my tongue from Mama's cakes, the smell of her hair as she tucked me into bed..."   
  
She blinked, and Ami's face blurred before her. The smile pulled unconsciously at her lips, suddenly self-conscious in a rare occurrence. "That about answer your question?"   
  
Pain flitted across the doctor's features. "Sorr---"   
  
But Hotaru shook her head, stopping her before she could even get the word out.   
"Don't. I wouldn't have said it if I wasn't comfortable with you knowing." She smiled, genuinely, and the bluenette returned it. "We've died together, Ami. Lived and loved and battled and fallen together... It's okay, really."   
  
The woman only nodded at her, so she continued.   
  
"But to be more specific, yes -- I miss them. But not the way you do. I miss them beside us in battle, yes. I miss their camaraderie and their guidance but mostly... I miss them as parents."   
  
"You grew up too fast."   
  
She smirked.   
"I grew up at just the right time."   
  
"Why?"   
  
She sighed. "I woke up one day and realized that the world was growing up around me. And suddenly I realized that I was missing it. The battles stopped, and we were just... human. And then you all graduated and went your separate ways. And then it was just us, the Outers; but even I was growing and I could see the wistfulness in their eyes -- the way Papa gripped the wheel when she took a tight turn, the way Mama disappeared for weeks and began releasing albums again."   
  
"They would have waited for you, Hotaru. We all would. Once you were grown, we would have come back."   
  
The raven shook her head. "I didn't want to wait. I wanted to join you. So I did. The Inners were away; it gave us a chance to adjust, to rewrite our story. They pulled me out of school, Puu did some magic with my papers. I was a high-schooler, then a twenty-something. They stayed for a bit, after I moved out. But it was easy for me to get a job, to get by. And then I was busy with work, with school, and they started touring again. I like it here. I like my shabby apartment, my friends, my job. It's... mine."   
  
Ami's words were a whisper.   
"...It's your normal."   
  
"You're my normal, yes."   
  


* * *

  
Hotaru had turned out to be an amazing budget cook.   
  
Ami assumed it had simply become a hobby of necessity; but considering the sad state of affairs her pantry was in, the woman miraculously had dinner sizzling happily away in a matter of minutes.   
  
Ami hummed happily, fishing the requested bottle out of a shopping bag and handing it to the raven, shrugging as she sipped lazily on a cold beer. "I dunno. I figured we could just go to the movies or something. It's no big deal."   
  
A scoff. "It's your birthday, Sunshine. You really had no plans?"   
  
The doctor shrugged, leaning against the counter to watch as the raven popped the cap open, generously adding the sauce that sent the pan into a vigorous sizzle. "I dunno. I always leave celebration planning to you guys. I don't really know who's available, and I don't want to ruin plans or anything."   
  
"It's your birthday, Ami. You're not ruining plans. You are the plan."   
  
Ami was ready with the plates as the raven gave the pan a final shake, plating the food and handing Ami the pair of them with a light brush. Ami smiled gratefully, wordlessly following the silent command as she moved to the living room, to the sound of water running and the sizzle of it as it hit the hot pan. "...Check my purse." 

\---  
  
Hotaru flicked the pan expertly, giving it a final shake before laying it in the dishrack to dry. She hummed happily, casting a last look around the kitchen with a quick wipe on her jeans before turning to follow the blunette into the next room.   
  
She jumped upon seeing the woman directly behind her, the tickets held before her like an accusation.   
  
"You got me a concert for my birthday?"   
  
She gulped. The silence should have clued her in. The thing about growing up too fast, you miss out on certain life lessons. Like how to birthday shop appropriately. "It's not YOUR concert, particularly"   
  
The smaller woman shook the tickets at her.  
"It has my name on the ticket!"   
  
Hotaru suddenly found herself backpedalling.   
"It's your mom's name too..."   
  
The blunette pulled in a long breath, staring down at the tickets in a long moment of thought before turning somber eyes to her. "This is a live orchestra of Bach's Fifth."   
  
"...yeah."   
  
"My favorite." Her voice was dropping to a whisper with each syllable.   
"It's being headlined by your mom."   
  
"Uhhm.. Yeah."   
She couldn't help the way her eyes darted towards the door, fumbling for an exit plan.   
  
"The concert.. is ON my birthday."   
  
Why was her throat so dry? Was it hot in here?   
"Well... Yes. It's also the weekend."   
  
Her next word came out through gritted teeth, as the doctor sucked in a long breath.   
"Explain."   
  
"Well."   
Why was it so hard to breathe all of the sudden? And something about the floor was so entrancing. She coughed, trying desperately to find the right words. She could feel those deep aquas boring into her.   
  
"Ever since I moved out, Mama and Papa, have always done a birthday concert for me.. But.. we skipped the last couple of years, so I just had this standing invitation.. But then, your birthday came up, and I know you like Bach, so I asked and of course Mama was all for it. So the second chair that's taking her place asked her why. So my mom said it was for Bach and apparently everyone was interested.."   
  
"And then there were just so many people volunteering, it was looking like they would have to rent a venue for it. But my mom told them, well, it was supposed to be a small thing. For a doctor friend. And everyone jumped on board with it. Suddenly they were renting a place and said, 'well let's do it for doctors then.' So now it's a fine wine and dine thing with a full orchestra, except you don't have to pay, of course, cuz it's your birthday and the funds are going to the Mizuno Foundation... So... yeah."   
  
Finally, she gained enough courage to look the smaller woman in the eye. When she finally spoke, the words shook, a small whisper that she barely heard.   
"So... You.. you got me a concert for my birthday."   
  
"Is... Is that bad?"   
  
She was so unprepared that the force of Ami's hug knocked them both back, making her stumble and lean against the counter. For a short moment, she only stood, speechless and confused as the smaller woman clung to her. But the tears were warm against her neck and she could hear the whispered thank yous against her ear.   
  
"Anything for you, Sunshine."   
  


* * *

  
"C'mon, you."   
Ami laughed, kicking the door open as she led a wobbling Hotaru into her apartment.   
  
"DId you have fuuuuun?"   
Hotaru instinctively leaned against the counter with a sigh, eyeing the blunette as she locked the door back shut behind her, shooting the woman a soft smile.   
  
"Of course I did.. I had a great time." Wordlessly, she wrapped her arm around a hip and Hotaru obediently leaned against her. "Thank you. It was a wonderful gift."   
  
The raven let out something between a laugh and a long sigh.   
"I thought shou were mad when I firsht gave you the tickets."   
  
"No. Jus--- Urp. Watch the door. There we go. Was just surprised. And I wasn't expecting everyone to show up either."  
  
"Whut, drow you a concert and not invite eberyone? What would be the point of that?"   
  
Ami chuckled, as they finally made it to their destination and she flicked on the light.   
"Huh, yeah. We haven't had everyone together for a while. And the first thing you do is try to take Mina on in a drinking challenge."   
  
Hotaru giggled, flopping into bed gracelessly   
"Yush!! But I won though!!"   
  
Ami chuckled lightly back, extracting her arm from beneath the raven and pulling her high-heels off for her. "Hmmm. I'm sure you'll be very proud of yourself come morning."   
  
"Mmm. But I’ll be fine. I have Doctur Mishuno here to take care of me."   
  
The blunette sat up, pulling off her own heels as well, before stretching out, getting comfortable under Hotaru's dark gaze. "  
  
My other side calls you Sunshine too."   
  
Ami smiled, tilting her neck flirtatiously.   
"Yeah? What else does she think about me?"   
  
A low hum danced from deep within Hotaru's throat and Ami closed her eyes, feeling it rush through her. A long sigh escaped her and before Ami could react, soft lips pressed against her own. Soft fingers graced along her neck. A short breath and she could smell the sweetness of her, lavender perfume, the soft bitterness of bourbon.   
  
A soft tongue brushed against her iips and Ami melted into it, allowing a heated tongue to slide against her own. The sensation built up within her chest until a helpless gasp escaped her. A hand found its way to Ami's neck, fingers entangling within her hair, claiming her, pulling her closer, while the younger raven pressed herself against Ami's body, pulling Ami’s leg to straddle her.   
  
Ami felt her own hands moving on their own accord, sliding over Hotaru's thighs, feeling their way up across distorting cloth of dress, allowing her fingers to explore the shape of her waist, probing the firm abdomen before restlessly shifting around to press against her back, urging the other's figure closer. The raven's hand in her neck grabbed her hard and her other hand moved along her side, molding her rather than drawing her shape, swiftly passing her chest to take a firm hold on her collar, pulling her closer with such an urgency their teeth collided.   
  
Hot, rapid breaths mixed with her own, and the raven withdrew her tongue, leaving Ami feeling suddenly eerily desolated, yearning for the heat now sliding across her lips, tasting their shape, before teeth bit into her lower lip. The sharp pain caused Ami to gasp harshly, involuntary flinching beneath the other when the teeth slowly let her go by allowing her sore lip to slip away.   
  
Ami felt the other's forehead leaning against her own, tilting her head just enough for her alluring lips to be out of reach, and the blunette heard herself whimper, felt herself drawn to follow, to recapture them. A deep purr erupted from the girl in her arms, causing Ami to open her eyes.   
  
Mauve eyes, darker than she was used to. Deeper than she was used to. More evolved, shaded, much more ..tainted.   
  
Saturn.   
  
She licked her lips, watching Ami, almost like a predator seizing its prey. Only there was more to it. Her heated breath ever so slightly quivered, her gaze roamed across Ami's face, but kept locking back on with Ami's eyes, her fingers in her neck and against her throat kept clenching, holding back, impatient but waiting.   
  
Ami pulled her head back, noticing how begrudgingly the other only slightly loosened her hold to allow that shift; her own breathing felt ragged in her throat, her gaze drew itself towards those slightly parted lips, watching as the raven bit her lower lip, another shaky breath escaped her own and her hands around the tender body involuntarily clenched into her dress.  
  


* * *

  
 _Six weeks later.  
_  
The psychic dropped her keys on the table, aware that there was someone in her apartment before she had even entered it. She grunted, leaning against the island counter with a curvy hip and crossing her arms before her as she glared at the intruder.   
"You could have called."   
  
Ami only shook her head, flashing a key between them as she dropped a heavy tomb into a forlorn box without meeting her eyes. "I used mine. I was just coming to grab my stuff."  
  
Hotaru humphed, but said nothing more as she watched the grace in motion move soundlessly before her. The shorter woman was fidgety under her gaze, and after a long silence she flinched, looking for words in the silent room. "I can leave my key if you want."   
  
Hotaru watched for a moment longer, stretching out the silence, stretching out the awkwardness as she watched the woman writhe beneath her steady gaze. She knew how much it pained the blunette, but she couldn't help that she got a derived form of pleasure from alienating herself like this, from pulling and cutting strings that weren't meant to be. Finally, she shrugged, letting out an elongated breath as she turned her back on the waiting woman with a dismissive wave. "You can do whatever you want."   
  
The silence was palpable as she opened her fridge, and the tinkle of ice into cup seemed to echo, the liquid that splashed into the cup crashing into the room as the smell of dark alcohol wafted up to the both of them. She looked up when the next text landed in the box with a thump, and Ami's statue had shifted from small to angry, her shoulders straighter, her back tighter, her eyes harboring a glint that seemed unfamiliar in those usually soft eyes.   
  
Hotaru couldn't help the sideways smile that crept across her lips, the single eyebrow that arched, tauntingly, aggressively, as she caught eyes with the woman across the room and took a languid sip of bitter liquid.   
  
_Strings. More strings to pull. So many buttons to press, so many lines to toe…_   
  
Another book landed with a clatter, and Hotaru tipped the glass back fully, slipping the reminder of the bitter liquid down her protesting throat. She echoed Ami's own motion, slamming the glass onto counter, the ice clinking, rattling around the cup in protest, and brought tinted eyes to glare back at Ami.   
  
"THAT'S what you've been too busy doing to see us? There was a youma last week, and Mako almost died. _You weren't there!_ "   
  
_Tell her the truth. Tell her you've been trying to quiet me_.   
  
The smirk fell back to her features, and she unscrewed the cap as she spoke.   
"It fills my time."   
  
The liquid pouring into the glass was aromatic and strong, and she welcomed it as it poured over protesting cubes. A tick pulsed in Ami's jaw, the motion of teeth grinding against each other distinct as her eyes flashed in anger. Hotaru only shrugged, lifting the glass to her lips as she savored a small sip. "So, was that all you needed, to come get your books and look down on me in my own apartment?"   
  
Ami pulled her stature up, leaning her weight back on balls of feet as the statement visibly threw her off-balance. She blinked, gathering her thoughts, her eyes dashing across the room before falling back to her, bright with anger and thought. "You know your parents called me yesterday? They said you haven't been by to see them in two months." They had a show here, in the city, for your birthday, and you didn't show."   
  
The liquor was hot and aggressive as it licked its way down her throat and she smacked her lips, relishing the taste.  
"Yeah, I had some things to do. I was busy that day."   
  
A palpable pause as silence settled over the room. Hotaru nursed her glass, while Ami rocked deeply on balls of feet, gathering her anger and holding her tongue. When she spoke again, it was soft, almost devoid of anger and replaced with a sadness laced with pity. "There's other people outside, you know... waiting for you."   
  
This time Hotaru rocked back on her own heels, pulling herself to full height with a steadying, cleansing breath as she rolled her eyes to the ceiling, backpedalling as she bridled her bucking temper. The pity sent Saturn beneath the surface rocking, pulling frantically at the reins held so haphazardly by alcohol. "There's an english text in my room... You might need that."   
  
Ami said nothing, but a gasp escaped her; so sharp and hurt that Hotaru would not have been surprised had a bright crimson bloomed and stained a stark contrast upon her lilting form. The azure orbs flashed to her, light and shining and full of hurt. They fell away just as quickly, and the sound of heavy footsteps followed her down the hall until they fell away once upon the soft carpet of her own bedroom.  
  
 _Do you think she's remembering how you kissed her, there in that bedroom?_   
  
Shut up.   
  
_Perhaps her eyes are washing over the lonely bed and she's thinking about the time she met... me._   
  
Stop.   
  
_She doesn't know how you lay awake at night and remember what she smells like! She doesn't know that that's why you refuse to see her, does she?_   
  
Hotaru grimaced, pouring herself a fresh, dry shot and tossing it back in desperation. The angry, haughty laughter faded as the colors swirled and the world wavered beneath her. Hotaru blinked to see Ami standing before her in the hallway, the glass falling back to the counter with a tap and a look of disgust crowding Ami's features.   
  
The anger rose in her instantly; hot and fervid and uncontrollable. The room cooled slightly but she closed her eyes against it and steadied herself against the counter. She fluttered her eyes open, a cool, toothy smile on her lips and all the anger and destruction displayed brazenly in her eyes. "You know. It's probably better if I take that key after all."   
  
The pain was imminent in the blunette's eyes, and she took a step back, grasping the heavy text in even tighter fingers. The sane side of Hotaru told her to stop, to backpedal, to save this. But Saturn was in control now, the anger licking at her insides, making her want to explode and the hurt in Ami's eyes was only fueling, feeding this foreign monster.   
  
The blunette visibly steeled herself, pausing her backpedal, her fingers squeezing white around the heavy text in her hands. Her eyes hardened and she stepped forward, closing the distance between herself and the box, dropping the book in with a thump. "If that's what you want."   
  
Saturn only smiled further, savoring this.   
"That is what I would like, yes."   
  
The tick returned to Ami's cheek as she pulled the keys out of her pocket. Saturn watched silently, settling onto barstool as she triumphantly watched the woman struggle with removing the key from ring, the tears pulling at corners of her eyes, gloating upon the slight shake in her fingers. "You hide in here from the world with your drink, Hotaru."   
  
Another sip as she watched.   
"I will."   
  
The key landed with a smack, clattering across the counter and finally sliding to an injured stop in front of her.  
"You... you and your friend in your head."   
  
_Oh! But she DOES remember me. I wonder, does she savor it? Or does she simply try to bury me away like an unwelcome guest? Ask her, does she hide it as you do, guard it, like your treasured secret? Or does she drink it all away into oblivion like a cryptic secret?_   
  
The smile on Saturn's lips fell away, and when she spoke her voice was ice-cold.   
"You leave my friend out of this."   
  
Ami returned the cold stare ten-fold, unshed tears shining behind her eyes as the temperature of the room dropped. "There's real people waiting out there. If you wanna sit in this apartment and rot, you be my guest. But you don't need real friends, right? Not when you have your other in here with you."   
  
There was nothing left but hot, licking anger. She didn't notice the cup trembling on the counter between them, the frost that blanketed the room, the pufts that escaped their lips and settled upon soft features. She stood, the power of Saturn dripping, leaking into the room around them. "Thanks for stopping by, Ames. It was real nice o' you."   
  
Ami nodded, her lip curled angrily before teeth, spitting her words as she backpedalled towards the box and door.   
"I guess you don't need us."   
  
Hotaru flinched, the pots and utensils behind her rattling in their place as she moved around counter to watch her leave. Ami laid box against hip effortlessly in her strong grip, her other land laying on doorknob. "Who needs friends when you have power, right?"   
  
The whole room rattled between them. The table shook, spasmed on its legs, as the box spit pages in all directions, a vacuum swirling them around the room. The space between them opened, the stars and sun blinding, spinning, twinkling in their majesty as they floated before them.   
  
"NOBODY KNOWS THE PRICE OF MY POWER!"   
Her hair whipped around them in a cyclone, the vacuum of space opening up and pulling at them. The furniture rattled in its place, the anger dripping, lapping at her until she knew no reason. All she felt was power- pure and angry and so intense she could lose herself in it. It swallowed her, enveloped her, and all she knew was the white-hot grip of it, suffocating her. The exhilarating thrill of it coursed through her body and she relished it.   
  
Soft lips pressed against her own and the power washed away, relinquishing its possessive hold upon her. The room stilled to silence, the wind ceased. The sudden void left her empty, helpless in it's abandonment and for the first time the caw of Saturn fell silent. The room was still around them, the fluttering pages raining upon them as Ami held up her suddenly frail body. A whimper cut through the air and with closed panic Hotaru recognized it as her own. A shaky, raspy breath escaped her and she realized she was trembling, powerless beneath Ami's touch. The loss of anger left her tired, lethargic and all she was was spent, wasted away and Ami's sweet kiss was grounding her, holding her steady.   
  
Ami's words were a whisper. She could taste her own tears upon soft lips.   
"I do."   
  
A shuddering breath escaped the raven, as if breathing for the first time. She laid her forehead against Ami’s and when she opened them there were oceans before her.   
“My Sunshine.”   
  
“That’s right. I never left.”   
  
She followed the pull of the arms around her, until her knees hit the back of the couch and she relented, sighing thankfully against the cushions. Ami followed beside her, tucking snugly against her and pulling back an errant strand of hair with soft fingers. The touch didn’t leave, instead fell to her face and Hotaru sighed thankfully into it as she wiped her tears. It took a moment for the words to process after she heard them. “You never gave me a chance to return the favor from that night.”   
  
Her breath caught in her throat, and she raised panicked eyes to Ami’s but the aquas there were shining with amusement. She had to force herself to breathe, to remind herself that it was real. “You… You fell asleep…”   
  
Her laugh sounded like music.   
“And you were gone in the morning.”   
  
Her touch was cool, a whisper of a breeze with a promise of winter coming and the raven focused on memorizing it. Ami’s hands fell against her and she followed, until she was laying back on the couch and Ami sprawled halfway on top, halfway beside her. “And of course I fell asleep. Saturn’s a bit intense.”   
  
She could feel the burn in her cheeks, so she focused on the weight of the woman on top of her, grounding her. Soft lips laid themselves against her ear, but her heart shot into her throat for a completely different reason when Ami’s words fell to her.   
“I’d rather just have you tonight.”

**Author's Note:**

> Welp, that's it. It's an amazing feeling to be able to hit that 'post' button again. It's been too many years.
> 
> Did you like the petname Hotaru picks for Ami? As soon as I landed on it I thought, 'perfect'. 
> 
> Did I get the little details right? What kind of drink would be Ami's favorite? I figured mojito cuz mint and it's light and refreshing for a lunch outside. I make a mean one. Hotaru would love a nice, cool mimosa for lunch on a warm day. But she usually prefers dry, red wines. Sangria when she wants something sweet. 
> 
> I have another one-shot that I'm planning to edit and get moved over here from ff. Then we're gonna start working on some of our bigger projects. So, more coming.
> 
> Wash your hands!~


End file.
